Theresa and I really like having sex in public. Why, just this morning, we were in our bedroom, and ...

What? Why are you looking at me like that?

Oh, you don't think the bedroom's a public place? Well, you obviously don't have our landlord. See, we were just minding our own business, having some nice after lunch sex, when we hear a knock on the front door. Now, of course we didn't answer it, we were busy, and all our friends have cell phones, so they don't just drop in on people.

But apparently, the landlord, or his maintinance guy, has a key. So, we hear a much louder knock, followed shortly by "Maintinance!" from inside! We yelled down to him to ask what he wanted, and he said that we needed to leave the heat on if we left for the holidays, or else the pipes would freeze. Little did he know that it was already too late!

I really thought that my days of having 10 seconds warning before some maintinance man burst through my door ended when I left the dorm. These people have my number, why don't they just call? Send me a postcard? *sigh*